» Hints, Tips & Techniques

Picking up from yesterday’s post. You need to understand that there are no good guys and villains in this model.  It may seem that if only the elephant wasn’t so easily distracted we’d be fine but it isn’t that simple.  The elephant is big and powerful and can do much to get us there.  The […][...] read more » The rider & the elephant – part 2

It is a fact that change is hard; even when we know there is a good reason for changing, we still struggle to live into our good intentions.  Phrases like “Well I know I shouldn’t …BUT” emerge from our lips.  Two American brothers called Dan & Chip Heath wrote a book called “Switch”, where they […][...] read more » The elephant and the rider – part 1

If you are human, you usually have a small voice in your head telling you that you aren’t good enough.  Sometimes it is identifiable as the voice of a particular parent, teacher or coach.  Even if that isn’t quite you, then you probably have uttered phrases like “That always happens to me!” or “I’m never […][...] read more » Silence your inner critic

The other day I had a very difficult meeting to facilitate.  A business was facing a tsunami of troubles, their very survival was at a stake and they needed to plot a course which gave them the best chance of survival.  These things are difficult on many levels.  There are complex business reasons why they […][...] read more » Difficult meetings–the elephant in the room

In my experience most people are poor at giving good feedback.  Usually they don’t realise there is a way to do it properly and their so called ‘feedback’ often does not come from a neutral place within the ‘giver’.  If you are feeling annoyed or let down by the person, it is likely this will […][...] read more » Feedback to difficult people

We are all guilty of dismissing small talk as a waste of time and I know I’m not the only one who has loudly declaimed how much I hate it.  However, a little more thought and study shows that far from being a waste of time, it is a vital piece of social glue.  Think […][...] read more » Small talk is a big deal

The word sorry originates from the prehistoric Germanic root word meaning “sore or pained”, the English Dictionary offers us several different meanings a few definitions being “feeling regret, compunction, sympathy, pity”, but there is a study published in the Harvard Business Review which studies the social impact of apologising on your relationships.  The bottom line […][...] read more » Why saying “Sorry” might be a good idea

We all know that Charles Darwin said that survival was a prize won by the fittest, suggesting that we compete for scarce resources.  However this is only part of the truth, because if we look at nature, there is far more evidence that co-operation is the best route to survival.  You can look at colonies […][...] read more » Being nice pays… scientifically speaking

I came across a couple of things today which seemed to be on a similar theme.  The first was an interview with some Tech ‘experts’ who were discussing the impact of technology on our lives and how it impacted our free time; do we have more more or less free time when we could get […][...] read more » Choices

When I was training, this was labelled ‘feedback’, and everyone learnt to cringe as soon as they heard the phrase “Can I give you some feedback..”  which was inevitably an excuse for them laying into you whilst feeling superior about it all… at least that is how it felt!  However, from time to time we […][...] read more » Dealing with problem behaviour