Posts Tagged ‘attention’

Just a streak of dust

Thursday, August 13th, 2009

Last night saw a meteor stream called the Perseids streaked through the sky last night.  This dazzling show is produced by tiny specks streaking through the upper atmosphere.  This amazing, eye-catching  display was produced by just a little dust.

I wonder how often our attention is grabbed and captured by some tiny thing that streaks across our mind and creates a ‘display’ out of all proportion to the cause?  I know it happens to me.  Wouldn’t it be nice if we could just sit back and enjoy the spectacle as one could with the meteors…

“I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet.”   Jack London

 

Technorati Tags: ,,

Tags: , , , ,
Posted in Personal Change | No Comments »

If you get your ears syringed does it make you a better listener?

Friday, June 5th, 2009

Apparently I have very narrow ear canals, and periodically they need attention.  When I find myself not hearing people consistently, that is my signal to toddle off and see the nurse.  When I come out it is as if a veil has been drawn back between me and the rest of the world.  However, does hearing better equate to being a better listener?  Whilst it certainly helps, it isn’t the same thing at all.

Listening is about giving your attention to the other person and what they are saying.  You listen with more than just your ears as you have to use your eyes too.  This both affects how they feel and gives you lot more data about them and how they are feeling.   You can also pick up information  at a more subliminal level about their energy.  Whilst you can learn to listen better I really think that an awful lot of this comes from who you are and what you care about.

Today would be a great day to give someone a really good listening to…

“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”    Robert McCloskey

“To listen well, is as powerful a means of influence as to talk well, and is as essential to all true conversation”   Chinese Proverbs

 

Technorati Tags: ,

Tags: , ,
Posted in Business Change, Hints, Tips & Techniques, Personal Change | No Comments »

Auto Erotic

Saturday, September 27th, 2008

Today my son is out in the drive, washing his new car. By new of course I don’t mean ‘new’, I mean new to him. He is loving his new pride-and-joy. I still remember fondly my first car, as I suspect we all do, and that heady period when we lavished it with time, care and goodies. I spent hours fitting a tape deck in my Hillman Imp, in which even the heater was regarded as an ‘extra’.

The thing is we spend time, care and resources on those things that matter to us. Conversely people can observe where and with whom we spend our time and energy and deduce what is important to us and where they sit in the pecking order.

Make sure that today you are attending to those things and those people who are truly important to you and don’t let yourself get distracted by all the ‘noise’. For each day that you manage to pull off this trick, you will bring your inner and outer worlds closer into alignment.

“Good things happen when you pay attention.” John F Smith
“When you make a commitment to a relationship, you invest your attention and energy in it more profoundly because you now experience ownership of that relationship.” Barbara de Angelis

Tags: , , ,
Posted in Business Change, Hints, Tips & Techniques, Personal Change | No Comments »

What are you Watching…

Sunday, April 27th, 2008

I was out walking in the sunshine yesterday. I knew the time, in a Saturday sort of a way; It was somewhere between half past breakfast and quarter to lunch. We had been out for an hour or so and I was wondering what the time was and glanced at my watch as you do. I don’t know if you have noticed but we seem to be capable of looking at our watches, apparently reading them and yet not quite really knowing what they have told us. You know that you are doing this when a companion, seeing you do this asks the time and you have to look a second time to answer them.

So, there we were strolling in the woods, I look at my watch and am just covering up my watch again when I realise that I completely don’t understand what I have just seen. It takes a moment for me to realise that I was not able to read the time. I look again and it appears to be telling me that it is quarter past seven! After a few moments more confusion, all becomes clear to me… I have my watch on upside down! Reality is reasserted.

However, it occurs to me that we are so often in the auto-pilot mode that we have conversations, without really engaging any of our awareness. It is possible that the odd husband out here will recall being told that he is “not listening” and perhaps even, if he likes living dangerously, repeat back what has just been said. However, hearing and listening are not the same thing. Also, when we are truly engaged with someone we bring to bear so much more than just our hearing; we use our awareness. We can pick up so much more if tune in fully.

When we are on the receiving end of this kind of attention it is a very powerful experience. Flattering, a little intimidating, slightly disconcerting and seductive all rolled up into one. We all do it perfectly naturally from time-to-time. However, the impact of fully engaging with people and situations on your relationships, your business and health is astonishing. Why not give it a go…. Some people think that we get what we focus on. Who or what are you giving your attention to?

 

“The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention.”
Richard Moss

Genius is nothing but continued attention.” Claude Adrien Helvetius

 

Tags: , ,
Posted in Communication, Hints, Tips & Techniques, Personal Change | No Comments »

Timing is everything!

Monday, April 14th, 2008

I was on a long drive yesterday in conditions that could only ever happen in England, in April! We started off in lovely spring sunshine, and after about half an hour were driving into a sky that was battleship grey, split by forked lightening and soon I appeared to be piloting a submarine! It was just some of the nastiest motorway driving I have done in years. This cycle of sun and rain continued as we drove north and east.

Our journey, luckily, was without incident and we arrived safely. However, we must have past at least 3 accidents en route. Now, I don’t imagine any of those people left home expecting that day to be any different from any other; they didn’t expect to suddenly suffer some mechanical fault, or be the victim of some random idiot, or have their own misjudgement so horribly called to account. The fact is that ‘stuff’ happens, and if our only strategy is to assume that it only happens to other people then one day, who knows, there might be a painful and rude awakening.

Perhaps had each of these people driven just a little faster, or a little slower, they would not have been in Harm’s way. In life, timing is really everything. Things you can get away with one day, you are punished for another; things you are rewarded at one time can later count against you. I hasten to add; I am not just talking about driving accidents, but life in general, and Change in particular.

So, the key is remaining aware and sensitive to your environment; extending your sensitivities and tuning in, rather than numbing out. You have to be responsible for what you are doing rather than switching to ‘cruise control’.

“Life is all about timing… the unreachable becomes reachable, the unavailable become available, the unattainable… attainable. Have the patience, wait it out It’s all about timing.” Stacey Charter
“When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute – and it’s longer than any hour. That’s relativity.”
            Albert Einstein

Tags: , , ,
Posted in General, Hints, Tips & Techniques | No Comments »