DEALING WITH OTHER PEOPLES’ STRESS

In yesterday’s blog I discussed some tips on dealing with stress, and it occurred to me that there was a rather different set of strategies and skills required to survive other peoples’ stress! I don’t claim this is in anyway an exhaustive list, but, with your help, we can add to it.

Recognise it: It seems very obvious but the first thing to do is actually be aware that the person you are dealing with is stressed. If this is someone you work with, learn to read the signs; if you are male, and it is someone you live with, dial up your awareness as you probably are in your own little world and blissfully unaware of it! If this is just someone you are encountering in the normal course of their work, think about the nature of the job they do and be prepared accordingly.

Practical help: Do what you can to remove or reduce the cause of their stress. If they feel there is too much to do, help them with their tasks (or at least those they would safely entrust to you), certainly do nothing to make matters worse for them! Do things without being asked, in a low profile way. Never come between them and the object of their fixation.

Never, ever say “You are stressed”, these words are bound to draw their fury like no other.

Physical Help: Do what you can to help them relax, drinking water, warm drinks, perhaps very small amounts of medicinal alcohol (where appropriate), food if they have skipped meals, warm baths (if in a domestic environment), removing extraneous noises

Empathy: Feel what they feel (but at a reduced level), get along side them; support them by all of the above means. Let them feel your support. Often at home, an arm round the shoulder or a cuddle can do so much more than mere words. Give them your time.

Avoid conflict and confrontation: in the words of the ancient Greek medics, “First, do no harm”. Don’t aggravate, annoy or attack them. Chances are they are not being very pleasant and our natural impulse is to strike out; needless- to-say, this doesn’t help, it is a bit like throwing petrol on the bonfire!

Good Luck and let me know what works for you….

“ Stress: The confusion created when one’s mind overrides the body’s basic desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it” Anon

““Don’t sweat the small stuff… and it’s all small stuff.” Richard Carlson

 

This entry was posted on Saturday, January 5th, 2008 at 09:37 and is filed under General, Hints, Tips & Techniques, Mini-Articles. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.