» Personal Blog

I have previously written about our choice to try to make something positive from Carys’s untimely death.  It seemed to the only choice we could make.  When I entered that Intensive Care ward, and saw all those beds, each representing a tragedy for another family, when I passed those families in the corridors, how could […][...] read more » Organ donation – what they don’t talk about

This has been a real lesson.  In work we tend to tick things when they are ‘done’, but in real life progress is more subtle and fragile.  It is much more like gardening, and the tender shoots are very vulnerable when they first emerge.  We have done a great job of pulling together, getting organised […][...] read more » Progress is fragile

I was thinking this morning about my blog and some of the responses that I got to it, and I realised that there are some experiences that just change you in ways that alter your DNA.   People who have not shared those experiences can never understand those who have.  My father’s generation went to war; […][...] read more » I’m different…

I know that some of you are wondering how things are going at Cooke Towers, and I have been rather silent of late.  Life has been taking a firm hand a forcing me to take things rather easy and it has as if Life has pushed a giant pause button on my life.  The latest […][...] read more » Personal Update

I know that all of our lives have ups and downs but we seem to be on a rollercoaster ride.  In my last blog, I talked about being forced to stop.  Last week, it got even worse; I had a stupid cold and could barely keep my eyes open.  I spent a week sleeping blowing […][...] read more » Emerging…

For probably the first time in my life, I’ve stopped.  I don’t mean I’m a taking a holiday, or something like that, I mean stopped.  About a month back I had a little medical ‘episode’ and since then I have not been able to drive and things have ground to a halt.  It may have […][...] read more » Stopping is a change too

Those of you of a certain generation might remember Cilla Black singing Burt Bacharach’s lyrics, asking this immortal question “What’s it all about?”   Now I won’t claim ever to have been so arrogant as to have the an answer to this, but I did have a working hypothesis that worked for me.  I was the […][...] read more » What’s it all about Alfie?

So today saw me jet-washing the patio.  Then I heard a mower going and discovered my son was mowing the lawns.  I went in to find No 1 daughter cleaning the kitchen.  Later in the day, No 2 daughter came in apologising for having over-spent our budget on shopping.  I wasn’t concerned about the minor […][...] read more » All hands to the pumps

Today we scattered Carys ashes.  We went to a place which is one of my favourite walks, with a view t20 miles to both the North & South Downs.  As we walked there, I was very aware of carrying her there.  That weight spoke volumes.  It is such a beautiful place, the birds were singing […][...] read more » Carys last journey

We are approaching a tough period soon.  On Sunday it is Mothers day, followed eight days later by our anniversary, then the following week it is her birthday.  Nothing like laying it on with a trowel is there?  I have no idea how we will handle this or what we will do on those days. […][...] read more » A difficult time