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Being wrong.. pt2

Following on from yesterday’s blog about being wrong, I’d like to explore this a little more in the world of work. If you are a boss, it is easy to feel that it is your job to solve every problem, rather than just getting them resolved. It is easy to become invested in ‘being right’ rather than discovering the right solution. If our status or ego is invested in ‘being right’, then ‘being right’ can feel the same as ‘being the boss’… and that is who we are, isn’t it? When who you are equates to your position or status, then anything that ‘attacks’ it, is a personal attack. In today’s crazy workplace where here in Britain we work longer than anywhere else in Europe, by the time we get home, we have little left to give, we tend to invest even more heavily in our work persona.

This means being wrong here fundamentally undermines our view of our value, at least at an emotional level. If our bosses are compelled to be right then the rest of us have to stomach being wrong, and that is utterly unpalatable to most people; it literally poisons their system. For those who work as ‘experts’ such as consultants and people in professional services fields, then ‘being wrong’ is even worse! This can become a Gordian knot when it is the client who is putting us in this position; you can’t serve two masters – who do you listen to, the customer or your ego?

The answer seems to lie in realising that we are loveable and valuable as human beings whether we are right or not, but I suspect internalising this lesson is one of the hardest we all face. Of course, it is very easy to tell ourselves we are not like this, and we don’t need to face up to this dilemma. If by any chance, you hear a little voice in your head telling you that this doesn’t apply to you …. Chances are that you are wrong!

“Don’t argue for other people’s weaknesses. Don’t argue for your own. When you make a mistake, admit it, correct it, and learn from it / immediately.” Stephen R. Covey

“I’m willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.” Samuel Goldwyn

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This entry was posted on Monday, April 7th, 2008 at 10:15 and is filed under Business Change, General, Leadership, Personal Change. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

2 Responses to “Being wrong.. pt2”

  1. carys says:
    7 April , 2008 at 10:56

    I recall going to a talk a few years ago given by a guy from Psychology of Vision. It was a fascinating evening and he really got my attention, most especially for his final comment which was along the lines of ‘if you take anything from this evening out into the world with you please let it be that there is no such thing as right!’ That principle has stayed with me and has held true every time and way I have tested it. Remembering it and living it makes me a better partner, mum, friend etc., and forgetting it makes me a bit of an ass at times. Although… if what he said was right then how could he be right?!

  2. richardderwentcooke says:
    7 April , 2008 at 12:03

    I think there is a difference between sharing things that are ‘right’ and ‘being right’. Also, we are all ‘right’ some of the the time, but this is never what worries us. It is how we respond when we are not that shapes what happens to us. What would it be like if students who hadn’t mastered a particular lesson blindly kept insisting that they had, they couldn’t go on to the more advanced class could they? I suspect this is what the Universe does to us…

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